I'm from Texas, so I appreciate all things Southern. Although we are our own breed in the Lone Star State, it's important to pay homage to the ancient cities of the South where the legacy began. I think even chivalry still exists there!! You can imagine my thrill when I recently found myself booking a flight to Savannah, Georgia in order to go on a beach vacation to Hilton Head, South Carolina with my two friends Kristin and Ashley. SAVANNAH, GEORGIA!! You can't say that name without using a Southern drawl!
Well Savannah turned out to be quite the lazy Southern town you would imagine, and the beach at Hilton Head turned out to be the perfect getaway for a busy corporate cube dweller like myself. But, we found the real fun in the most unexpected series of events at the unsurprisingly most empty bars in town. On Thursday night of our trip, in the middle of the island's off season, we decided to have a night on the town! We didn't expect it to be a night to write home about, but we thought it would be prudent to check out the local watering holes just to keep with our youth.
The first stop was Hot Mama's. I will admit, being the proper refined lady that I am (I am ignoring the fact that I will challenge any of my guy friends to see who can drink the most in a given night.), that I was a bit afraid of the name Hot Mamas. All I could picture were tattoos and motorcycles! I was even more convinced that this night would be a total floozy when I saw that there were hardly any cars in the parking lot. Oh boy.
We walk into Hot Mamas, and the first 8 min were quite routine and mundane. Step up to the bar, show id, order drinks. However, after those 8 minutes....history was made. A young Southern gentleman walked over to introduce himself. He worked in the liquor business, and he was there to offer us some free tasting of a shot. Score! We down the shot in a group, and he then proceeded to tell us why he loves his brand- because of the vanilla aftertaste. This shot goes down smooth because of the vanilla aftertaste. In case we were endangered of forgetting why this liquor was so special, he reminded us about the vanilla aftertaste.
It took about 5 minutes to realize that he took his job very seriously. Therefore, he was plastered.
I have a lot of respect for a man like that. Hard workers make hard drinkers. I should know myself. However, when you are much much more sober than another person, you can't help to ridicule them. We continued the night with the standard conversation of the who, what, where, when, how, and why of our lives. Literally, that was our entire night with this man. Due to his intoxication, we discussed the whos, whats, wheres, whens, hows, and whys over and over again. I can still tell you that he is from Kentucky and has a roommate from Texas Tech University who is a professor who got his doctorate in the food and beverage business. He repeated these facts about 4-5 times; and I, being the good student that I always have been, easily memorized these facts. Is there a pop quiz? We, on the other hand, were not so nice. Every time it was our turn to discuss the 5 w's, we changed our story. I was a spin instructor at one point. I can't remember what the other girls were. I'm sorry, but they never repeated once!!
The night did take an uninvited turn. Apparently the guy liked to bike, and I was a spin instructor. Oh, and apparently my name is Elizabeth? Not only that, but he said he was also going to be sampling some tequila soon. He asked me, "when can I sample you?" I had to ask him to repeat, out of genuine concern, I wanted to make sure I heard this one right :) "When can I sample you?" ...Excuse me? "When can I sample you?"
Interesting pick up line, sir. Poor chump, he meant well. It was just the vanilla aftertaste that ended up getting the best of him. The vanilla aftertaste. It gets you every time!
Well Savannah turned out to be quite the lazy Southern town you would imagine, and the beach at Hilton Head turned out to be the perfect getaway for a busy corporate cube dweller like myself. But, we found the real fun in the most unexpected series of events at the unsurprisingly most empty bars in town. On Thursday night of our trip, in the middle of the island's off season, we decided to have a night on the town! We didn't expect it to be a night to write home about, but we thought it would be prudent to check out the local watering holes just to keep with our youth.
The first stop was Hot Mama's. I will admit, being the proper refined lady that I am (I am ignoring the fact that I will challenge any of my guy friends to see who can drink the most in a given night.), that I was a bit afraid of the name Hot Mamas. All I could picture were tattoos and motorcycles! I was even more convinced that this night would be a total floozy when I saw that there were hardly any cars in the parking lot. Oh boy.
We walk into Hot Mamas, and the first 8 min were quite routine and mundane. Step up to the bar, show id, order drinks. However, after those 8 minutes....history was made. A young Southern gentleman walked over to introduce himself. He worked in the liquor business, and he was there to offer us some free tasting of a shot. Score! We down the shot in a group, and he then proceeded to tell us why he loves his brand- because of the vanilla aftertaste. This shot goes down smooth because of the vanilla aftertaste. In case we were endangered of forgetting why this liquor was so special, he reminded us about the vanilla aftertaste.
It took about 5 minutes to realize that he took his job very seriously. Therefore, he was plastered.
I have a lot of respect for a man like that. Hard workers make hard drinkers. I should know myself. However, when you are much much more sober than another person, you can't help to ridicule them. We continued the night with the standard conversation of the who, what, where, when, how, and why of our lives. Literally, that was our entire night with this man. Due to his intoxication, we discussed the whos, whats, wheres, whens, hows, and whys over and over again. I can still tell you that he is from Kentucky and has a roommate from Texas Tech University who is a professor who got his doctorate in the food and beverage business. He repeated these facts about 4-5 times; and I, being the good student that I always have been, easily memorized these facts. Is there a pop quiz? We, on the other hand, were not so nice. Every time it was our turn to discuss the 5 w's, we changed our story. I was a spin instructor at one point. I can't remember what the other girls were. I'm sorry, but they never repeated once!!
The night did take an uninvited turn. Apparently the guy liked to bike, and I was a spin instructor. Oh, and apparently my name is Elizabeth? Not only that, but he said he was also going to be sampling some tequila soon. He asked me, "when can I sample you?" I had to ask him to repeat, out of genuine concern, I wanted to make sure I heard this one right :) "When can I sample you?" ...Excuse me? "When can I sample you?"
Interesting pick up line, sir. Poor chump, he meant well. It was just the vanilla aftertaste that ended up getting the best of him. The vanilla aftertaste. It gets you every time!
Me and my accomplices after a long night of poking fun at a Southern drunky.
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